there’s a tornado coming

I was at a park with a group of families for a campout once, and the weather was a little wet and stormy, with even a tornado warning. As usual at such an event, there was a lot of running around and excited shouting. Ariel, seven years old, came abruptly up to her parents, with whom I was talking at the moment. I didn’t really know her, although I knew she would be my student the next fall. She said, “There’s going to be a tornado!”

I asked her, “Are you scared about it, or are you excited?” She looked at me blankly for a few moments and then dashed away from us.

Ariel’s expression did not give much idea how she felt about her news, and so prompted my question. She seemed more interested in the effect on other people of the idea of a tornado than on herself. When I asked that question, maybe she didn’t really know the answer. It’s good for adults not to predict or assume what a child feels without some clear signal from the child. It takes many years for children to understand what they feel and what feelings are. (Let’s be honest; sometimes adults are still wondering.)

What children do have that many adults don’t is a fresh point of view. I can remember many times in my life when I witnessed people’s reactions to something and then came to regard the thing as wonderful or terrible. I’m very glad to allow children to develop their own judgment when there is no reason for me to impose my own.